Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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