What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize