Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
