some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
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