4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
