he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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