Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
