my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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