I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
