the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
