If i come over, it means nothing
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
