she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
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