He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Randomize
