He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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