Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize