I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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