You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I want to make a zoo with you.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Randomize
