I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize
