thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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