i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Randomize