You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
