beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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