what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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