I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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