so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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