I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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