Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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