Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
