those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
