So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
