Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
