why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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