i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
