you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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