Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
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