Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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