I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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