And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
