Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize