hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Randomize
