Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
