is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
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