ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
