his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
