We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
You can't just leave with hair like that
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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