I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize