Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I think a kid would responsible me up
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
