No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Randomize