Ketchup is God's man juice
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
