Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
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