I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
The beer is more important than you right now.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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