Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
